Miracle Retreat

Today the winners of the Life Transformation contest & studio instructors participated in The 7 Life Miracles retreat with Julie Wilkes & Seven Studios. The 7 Life Miracles retreat is based off of Julie's new book of the same name (check it out on Amazon!)  I am currently in the middle of reading the book and, while it would be amazing to read at anytime, it coincides perfectly with the 6 month Life Transformation project.

Our group today was the first to experience the retreat but it will become something offered by the studio. I feel so honored to be one of the first to be involved in this powerful retreat and I am here to tell you that it is something you should take advantage of if you are able. It takes her book and teaches the lessons throughout the day through discussion and activities. I want to briefly share what we went through today because it was so motivating and inspiring and I feel a renewed passion for life. It was amazing. I feel compelled to share this positive day with you so that there may be a ripple affect but I want to also suggest reading the book and doing the retreat yourself because you will get even more out of it.

We talked about embracing life, living in the moment, seizing the day. What do we dream of doing? What is stopping us? What can we do about it? The perfect scenario is this very moment!

We talked about connecting. We have people and moments in life that teach us lessons. They either inspired us or their adversity led us to something greater. Connect in that, express your gratitude, see the lesson. The cool thing is that one day you will be able to pay that forward. You will be someone's coach, maybe without even realizing it. One exercise encouraged us to think about a person who served as a coach at some point in our lives. To really ponder on how pivotal those moments were and what an impact that person made was so powerful. We each wrote thank you notes to our person. Most of us, including myself, were practically sobbing through this. To put your thoughts and gratitude in words was so meaningful.

We talked about creating the life we want to live. This was a really cool topic for me because I am currently creating, planning and working through so many of my goals in the life-coaching aspect of the life transformation project. Really creating goals in a way that encourages action and in a way that can be measured takes time and a lot of writing. In the retreat, we did goal painting. We envisioned the life we wanted for ourselves and portrayed that as a painting. I chose a color to represent different aspects I want to see as a part of my life (to be surrounded by only people & things that add positive energy to my life, to be of healthy mind & body, to continue to learn & grow personally, to achieve professional growth & success, to travel & explore, to pursue passions & adventures) and applied it to canvas. So therapeutic and one of my favorite things. [photo below!]

We talked about empowerment. The fact that happiness is not the end result of something else. You choose to be happy and we discussed a challenge to make that a habit. The challenge is to, everyday for 30 days, experience one of four things: be inspired, get out of your comfort zone, learn new things, take time to relax & restore your body. I will talk about this more in a future blog post as I will be embarking on this challenge as a part of my continued life transformation.

We talked about choice. We choose our path. We choose if we want to change our story. We choose if we want to let go of our burdens or let them weigh us down. We choose if we need to change our mindset or our direction.

We talked about climbing and conquering our mountains. Our mountains should not be viewed as punishments. They are are there to show us something. We learn strength from our challenges and we learn to keep moving forward. When we strive to raise the bar and reach for something higher and higher, we will stumble. But there is no such thing as failure. Failure is life trying to move you in another direction. Our activity here was stair steps for what I think was two minutes but what seemed like much longer. When it seemed we were at our capacity, Julie asked us to think of something we really want and just envision that right in front of us. I stepped faster, I pushed through the burn in my thighs. Really picturing your goal right there and attainable truly made it easier for me to power through to reach it. It was one of those "If you can think it, you can do it" moments. Focus on why you can achieve something and not the reasons why you can't do it.

We talked about inspiration. We heard about an ancient Egyptian concept that when you die, you are asked two questions to get into Heaven: "Did you find joy in your life?" and "Did your life bring joy to someone else?" These are amazing questions to live by and I am so happy to have learned of this concept. We should strive to live so that we can answer "Yes" to these two questions. Be your own light, and be the light in someone else's darkness. We did an exercise to bring light to others and now we each have a piece of paper filled with 8 comments from the other members saying wonderful words about ourselves and how we have inspired them. It is really heartwarming.

This day was so amazing and such a wonderful investment of time. I am so blessed to have met these fabulous, positive people and share in this with them. Julie filled our retreat with inspiration and I am so glad I could share a little bit of our day with you!

Reaching for your goals

Part of my 6-month journey of transforming my life involves life-coaching, which is right up my alley. I loved what I got out of my experience with counseling (which works on your past and why you are where you are) so it only seems natural that once I figured that out, I would look to the future. You have to keep growing. 

In my life coaching sessions, we discussed five goals that I want to reach in 2014. This life coaching has been so eye-opening because ordinarily I wouldn't know how to break these down. For instance, my goal of living on my own. I know that isn't something I'm going to entertain until at least the 2nd part of this year. So, I would have put that on the back burner. Now I know that everything can get smaller and smaller. My coach has given me exercises to break that down so that I can be doing something today, that will help be get there in 6 months.

It's such a brilliant concept. Breaking things down into little baby steps gradually takes you to the place you want to be but it just seems much more manageable. There are more opportunities for achievement as well. Instead of one giant hurdle every so often, I can experience little victories every day. This only fuels my desire and commitment to reaching my goal. I've almost become obsessed with it. I started with 5 major goals but I've ended up with several smaller goals. Anything I want to change or add to my life, I just make it a goal. With this method of breaking it down and asking questions, I know I can make any goal attainable. 

For example, one of my goals for this year was to travel. Once a quarter I want to travel, either on a legitimate vacation or at least a weekend getaway. So I made plans to go visit my cousins in Nashville this coming weekend. Goal met, right? No. Through a coaching session I realized that my goal can't be to just travel. If that were the case I would have met my goal the second I step off the airplane and that's no fun. My coach asked me to reflect on what my goals were for this trip. What did I want to experience while I was there? What needed to happen to make this the trip? 

Well, no matter where I was traveling to, my answer would be relatively the same. Nashville is not a new city, I've been there multiple times. But anywhere I travel, I want to see it through fresh eyes. I want to experience the culture. The hidden gems. I want to learn something about it and I want to make my mark on it. I want to become a part of that city. Part of the allure of traveling is the anonymity of it. I love being in a city where no one knows you, no one knows your there. It makes it truly care free. There's an exhilarating freedom about that. My specific goal for Nashville is that I have to see live music, which won't be hard at all. I love the culture of that city, I love the music scene and I can't wait to be a part of it. My other goal is to really notice how I act in that environment. Maybe learn a few things about how I live when I have nothing to lose. Try to see if I can bring a little bit of that back to my city, experience this city like I would if I didn't live here.

Take any goal, especially one that seems unattainable or far off in the distance, and ask questions about it. I start by asking "How?" or "Why?" or "What will this scenario look like when it is reached?" Then you start figuring out how you are going to get there. Where do you need to start? When you figure out the little things you can do now, each day or each week, you'll see progress leading you to that goal. Sometimes, this part of breaking it down is the hardest. I've been stuck on my relationship goal for a few weeks. I just haven't touched it. I'm supposed to be asking myself questions and creating an action plan but I don't know yet what the baby-step goals are. So this week my goal is to figure out that Relationship goal (haha!) and I'll be writing more later on what it is and how it plays a role in The Single Girl Project. 

A Balancing Act

I have been thinking the past few weeks about living a balanced life. It is something I always strive to do, and something a lot of friends and colleagues are always trying to do. I have had more than enough examples in the recent past of the complications that come when one tries to live a balanced life. I am sure I'm not the only person who ever wonders "Is it really attainable?" Sometimes it seems we are all chasing after this illusion…working towards this goal of reaching balance that will never be realized. 

For me, my life revolves around work, family, friends, working out, hobbies and "me" time - where I just have quiet time to read or be alone. These are the things that make up my life, and they all come with certain demands. And they all, combined, run me ragged. I mean that in the best of ways. How boring and dull would life be if we removed all of the positive things that keep us busy? 

In yoga, for our body to be in balance, we need a strong core. The same is true in life. For our life to feel balanced, our center core must be strong. The ups and downs of daily life, the weeks where we feel like we're treading water…those moments are just exercising our inner core, our center soul. And, just like our body in yoga, our inner core should always be changing, always improving. Maybe this is why it feels like we're always running towards a peaceful balance without ever seeming to arrive. Maybe it's because we aren't supposed to ever truly arrive. The challenges strengthen us and the experiences teach us. If we were to get to this place where we are done and we feel that we've achieved a final completeness, then what would we have left to drive us?

I've written in the past about living in the moment, and experiencing the motions rather than just going through them as a means to get to the next one. To me, being in the moment means truly living and feeling life. It does offer an inner peace that we can carry with us through each minute of every day. But it takes practice to achieve this. Everyday we have to TRY at this. It is a lesson that is also never fully learned, at least in my opinion. If it came naturally, everyone would walk around in their own peace-emitting bubble. So it is something we have to strive for and I think we realize that because our inner core, our souls, recognize this feeling and yearn for it. That's why so many people out there join in the race to achieve this inner peace. 

I feel SO much inner peace these days. I've had the most extremely happy moments in my life before…every stage of my life I've had things to be happy about. But the happiness stemmed from some external influence. Where I lived, my job or friends, my significant other, etc. This is the first time I can recall being so happy on the inside, no matter the outside influences. It is quite powerful to realize the simplicity that comes along with being happy with only yourself. When you realize you are all you need and everything else just gets to come along for the ride…it is a wonderful sense of freedom.

But inner peace does not equal balance. They are associated with one another so for the longest time it seemed if you experienced inner peace, you would also feel balance in your life. This isn't necessarily true which is a concept I am just realizing. I can feel inner joy and I can have all of the parts of my life (work, people, activities, etc) out of control and over-stimulating, all at the same time. Or there are days when the complete opposite is true and, for whatever reason, your inner joy is a little subdued and you have a quiet schedule where you feel you are in control of your day. Or you may be really, really happy and feel in control of all the areas in your life. But you may or may not feel balanced in any of these situations. I've realized this is due to that inner core. The "me" time and taking care of yourself. If I have a busy day, the first thing to get pushed back to another day is my quiet time or my workout session. I think this is because every other part of the day someone else is depending on you and you can't let them down. But, you can't let you down, either! YOU are dependent on you. That has been the whole goal of my recent journey -- learning to be the best, healthiest me so that I can offer that version out to the world. You get back what you put out so I want that to be at its best. 

I've made more of a point to do whatever it takes to get my workout and my quiet time in. Whether it means getting up a little earlier or moving the rest of my schedule around so these parts of my day are accommodated. That isn't always easy to accomplish, but it is necessary. I have it scheduled in my day just like I would schedule a meeting with a client and everything else needs to fall into place around that. It's like the story about filling a jar with the big rocks, the little pebbles and the sand. {Check that story out here if you aren't familiar} 

At the end of the day, a lot of us are in the same boat. We feel like a duck paddling our feet like crazy under water while on the surface everything is running smoothly. Things come across our desk and our to-do list gets longer, and when Friday finally arrives we feel like we didn't accomplish a whole lot because our task list is longer than it was on Monday. It is mentally exhausting, actually. Most days I end with the thought "I just want to be caught up." But I don't know if we'll ever catch up. There will always be something more to do. And not just with work, but the good stuff, too. My list of fun things I want to accomplish in life will never be complete. It's okay if things get pushed till tomorrow. They'll still be there. The world won't end. Take care of yourself first. Learn the lessons your busy, out-of-control life is trying to teach you. Learn to recognize what being in balance feels like to you and take note of how you attained that. Keep practicing that. Eventually you will get to the point where you can handle beautifully the moments when life gets in the way of your to-do list. You will come to appreciate those moments, because they are teaching moments. They won't shake you anymore because your inner core is strong. Shift your perception that once you reach balance in your life, it's yours to keep. Your balancing act will never be complete. Once you've worked to attain balance, you will have to work to keep it. It's a journey, not a destination. Don't just chase after it, enjoy the run of getting there.

Living an Inspired Life

I don't like how it feels to not write. I need to write, so I miss it when I don't do it. It feels even worse when it affects other things, like this blog and its readers. So I apologize for my lack of posts over the last week or so. I've had a bit of writer's block! And, as much as I don't like to not write, it's worse if I write arbitrarily, unfocused and with divided attention. I need to write with inspiration, a sense of purpose, direction and meaning. So that's why I haven't written lately. I was not in the proper mindset to write something of quality.

Not only have I been incredibly busy {in the best of ways, but, still, there are only so many hours in a day} but I have also been doing a lot of reflection, building up to what I feel I am supposed to write. I've been reflecting through my daily journaling (not only in my Gratitude journal, but also in my thought journal.) All of this reflection has given me plenty of content to share with you so I am looking forward to a great week of blog posting -- touching on different challenges, different goals and different experiences.

Today, though, I want to write about yoga. [This may seem boring to you and you may be reading this and think that, because you don't practice yoga, this post has nothing to do for you. But that's not true!] It is important because it has impacted every area of my life and has been the reason for being able to not only reflect on moments or thoughts, but also to find the inspiration in them. I only added yoga to my routine in just the past few weeks and it has already transformed my life!

{which is SO exciting! the life transformation project is working!}

Our yoga sessions focus on being inspired and creating positive energy to send back out to the world, reflecting on gratitude throughout the duration and committing to an intention at every class - someone out there who inspires you to power through, or who needs some good energy. Julie, our instructor, is full of positive stories and affirmations that provide a new perspective and a renewed urge to push through a challenge. The mind-body connection of discovering your strength, both physical and inner determination, really speaks to me. I've learned that when a position is challenging and I want to quit, to just push myself a little more, to tap into a new level of inner strength -- this is something we all experience every day. Push yourself just a little more in that one moment where you want to quit and you will find that you overcome that moment. I've learned awareness -- of your breath and your core, of the moment and of the inspiration that is all around. Now, in the little frustrations that occur throughout the day, I have been able to remove myself and reflect on the fact that in the big picture, this one little moment is not strong enough to conquer my peace! I've learned that a deep breath, a positive thought or a quiet moment of being grateful, is enough to change your day, to change someone else's day, and to cause a ripple affect that will come back around to you.

Yes, I have known these things for a long time and try to live these lessons as best as I can. But, several posts ago [you can read them here and here], I talked about wanting to be able to live more in the moment and how it is hard to do with the challenges of the outside world trying to break you down everyday. Living in that moment of inner peace is not always easy. This is where yoga comes in. I was already a student of the teachings, I just hadn't practiced the lifestyle. Yoga has taught me how to apply its teachings in the outside world. Yoga has taught me how to dig a little deeper to find that peaceful spot and how to strengthen my roots and hold on to those moments a little tighter. I have now found the outlet that lets me apply the importance of positive attitude and gratitude to daily life. Yoga brings me this new level of inner peace -- I was born to be a yogi! :)

So even if you think yoga is not for you, I encourage you to carve out time where you can practice quiet moments of gratitude and positive thoughts. Once you become aware of how that feels, you will be able to recognize it more and live by it even better. It will make so much of a difference that you will find you need these moments, just like how I now need my yoga.