For me, my life revolves around work, family, friends, working out, hobbies and "me" time - where I just have quiet time to read or be alone. These are the things that make up my life, and they all come with certain demands. And they all, combined, run me ragged. I mean that in the best of ways. How boring and dull would life be if we removed all of the positive things that keep us busy?
In yoga, for our body to be in balance, we need a strong core. The same is true in life. For our life to feel balanced, our center core must be strong. The ups and downs of daily life, the weeks where we feel like we're treading water…those moments are just exercising our inner core, our center soul. And, just like our body in yoga, our inner core should always be changing, always improving. Maybe this is why it feels like we're always running towards a peaceful balance without ever seeming to arrive. Maybe it's because we aren't supposed to ever truly arrive. The challenges strengthen us and the experiences teach us. If we were to get to this place where we are done and we feel that we've achieved a final completeness, then what would we have left to drive us?
I've written in the past about living in the moment, and experiencing the motions rather than just going through them as a means to get to the next one. To me, being in the moment means truly living and feeling life. It does offer an inner peace that we can carry with us through each minute of every day. But it takes practice to achieve this. Everyday we have to TRY at this. It is a lesson that is also never fully learned, at least in my opinion. If it came naturally, everyone would walk around in their own peace-emitting bubble. So it is something we have to strive for and I think we realize that because our inner core, our souls, recognize this feeling and yearn for it. That's why so many people out there join in the race to achieve this inner peace.
I feel SO much inner peace these days. I've had the most extremely happy moments in my life before…every stage of my life I've had things to be happy about. But the happiness stemmed from some external influence. Where I lived, my job or friends, my significant other, etc. This is the first time I can recall being so happy on the inside, no matter the outside influences. It is quite powerful to realize the simplicity that comes along with being happy with only yourself. When you realize you are all you need and everything else just gets to come along for the ride…it is a wonderful sense of freedom.
But inner peace does not equal balance. They are associated with one another so for the longest time it seemed if you experienced inner peace, you would also feel balance in your life. This isn't necessarily true which is a concept I am just realizing. I can feel inner joy and I can have all of the parts of my life (work, people, activities, etc) out of control and over-stimulating, all at the same time. Or there are days when the complete opposite is true and, for whatever reason, your inner joy is a little subdued and you have a quiet schedule where you feel you are in control of your day. Or you may be really, really happy and feel in control of all the areas in your life. But you may or may not feel balanced in any of these situations. I've realized this is due to that inner core. The "me" time and taking care of yourself. If I have a busy day, the first thing to get pushed back to another day is my quiet time or my workout session. I think this is because every other part of the day someone else is depending on you and you can't let them down. But, you can't let you down, either! YOU are dependent on you. That has been the whole goal of my recent journey -- learning to be the best, healthiest me so that I can offer that version out to the world. You get back what you put out so I want that to be at its best.
I've made more of a point to do whatever it takes to get my workout and my quiet time in. Whether it means getting up a little earlier or moving the rest of my schedule around so these parts of my day are accommodated. That isn't always easy to accomplish, but it is necessary. I have it scheduled in my day just like I would schedule a meeting with a client and everything else needs to fall into place around that. It's like the story about filling a jar with the big rocks, the little pebbles and the sand. {Check that story out here if you aren't familiar}
At the end of the day, a lot of us are in the same boat. We feel like a duck paddling our feet like crazy under water while on the surface everything is running smoothly. Things come across our desk and our to-do list gets longer, and when Friday finally arrives we feel like we didn't accomplish a whole lot because our task list is longer than it was on Monday. It is mentally exhausting, actually. Most days I end with the thought "I just want to be caught up." But I don't know if we'll ever catch up. There will always be something more to do. And not just with work, but the good stuff, too. My list of fun things I want to accomplish in life will never be complete. It's okay if things get pushed till tomorrow. They'll still be there. The world won't end. Take care of yourself first. Learn the lessons your busy, out-of-control life is trying to teach you. Learn to recognize what being in balance feels like to you and take note of how you attained that. Keep practicing that. Eventually you will get to the point where you can handle beautifully the moments when life gets in the way of your to-do list. You will come to appreciate those moments, because they are teaching moments. They won't shake you anymore because your inner core is strong. Shift your perception that once you reach balance in your life, it's yours to keep. Your balancing act will never be complete. Once you've worked to attain balance, you will have to work to keep it. It's a journey, not a destination. Don't just chase after it, enjoy the run of getting there.
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